Spoiled child: how to redevelop
- 30 Jul 19:00
Probably there is no single parent who dreamed of a spoiled child. We are all trying to put in our beloved child maximum effort and diligence, bring up so that then we can be proud of the child, to teach them to behave in a society with dignity. What is our disappointment, if instead ofa obedient and educated baby, we grow up a spoiled and capricious little man. Is it possible to re-educate a spoiled child and how to do it, read in the materials of this article.
Table of Contents
1. What kind of a spoiled child is
2. Signs of seditiousness
3. Causes of child promiscuity
4. How will the spoiled child
grow? 5. Teachers and psychologists' tips for redeveloping
6. Instead of finding
What kind of a spoiled child is
Manywho among us saw gutted children on the street, on the playground, in the shop, in the transport, etc. Such a child always attracts attention: he cries, cries, cheers, curses. For any comments, it reacts inadequately, goes even further into hysteria. From the side it seems that the child does not obey adults, everything does on his own.
Psychologists call the child a spoof of disapproval. But in fact, it is difficult for a grouchy, capricious child to adapt in a society, almost always he has problems in communicating with peers, and to a real life outside his own home, where his relatives are located, he is incapable of being able to.
Whatever it seemed to parents, that indulgence in all trifles can have a positive effect on the nature of the child, this is a myth. At an older age, the social problems of such a child will only aggravate. It is unlikely that anyone will fulfill all the premonitions of such children in real life, admire and admire them. In the best case, such individuals are doomed to a deep disappointment in life, in people, at worst - it can lead to the development of complexes and mental illness.
Signs of Propensity
The degree of promiscuity depends on how much parents are trying to create more comfortable conditions for their child. Sometimes, even super-comfortable. Such a child is unlikely to be scolded because he offended someone in the yard, parents will try to simply "do not notice" so as not to sow the grain of uncertainty in it. But the effect turns out to be reversed. A child experiences impunity for misconduct, and his behavior can have very bad consequences.
We will try to describe a portrait of a spoiled child based on commonly accepted features.
The greed of the child
Spinelessness goes hand in hand with selfishness. The believer believes that all the good that is only in the world should be only for him and he does not intend to share with anyone. And it's not just in toys or any other personal things, not just in sharing with other children. Even a tiny sweetie for mom or dad in such a child is not possible to ask.
Try to refuse a child to buy a new toy, sweeten or uncontested performance of any of his other whims - in response to your refusal a storm will be thrown. The child will not just begin to cry and sneer, seduce anything, it will be a true hysteria. For children 3-4 years of this kind of behavior can somehow justify the unformed psyche, not understanding that this can not be done. But if your kid is older and allows you to do this, you should think about whether you are too much of it.
Absence of elemental independence of
This does not mean that a 3-year-old baby should be required to feed himself, independently went to kindergarten and cleaned a bed. At an early age, the lack of elemental autonomy manifests itself in the reluctance to fall asleep independently, attend a kindergarten, visit grandmothers without parents, and so on. With the age( about 4-5 years old), you should teach the child to clean toys, make up their belongings, and help the house to be covered on the table. Unwillingness to communicate with other people, children can also be attributed to promiscuity.
However, it is not necessary to confuse childish spoiledness with reluctance to communicate with specific children. It happens that the child does not come into contact with any particular child. In this case, try to find out the true cause of this behavior, and if it is related to the wrong behavior of another child, report it to his parents. It is not necessary to stop the psyche of your baby.
is denied, there is something that it is preparing
Everyone even has an adult has foods or dishes that he loves or does not like. But let's assume that all of us are without exception educated people. And in society, even if something is not up to us( for example, visiting a festive table), we do not speak loudly about it, but we try to make this fact unnoticed.
Another thing is small children. If something does not like a child, he is unlikely to force himself to swallow it, but still, because of his spontaneity, loudly declare that "this is a bitter abomination!" But even in this there is no sign of promiscuity.
But if your "gourmet" requires something else to cook for you every day, but it's not what it is, it's worth thinking about whether the child casts a rope on you, and really what you give him is not so tasty.
A child is constantly rumbling like an old man. Everything that happens around is causing him negative emotions, he is not happy with everything. Having seen at any of the children any toy, whether it is a scooter, a bicycle or rollerbells, he will surely roar hysteria, blaming everyone around in all mortal sins, only because he does not have such.
Does not Assist Parents
A child should be taught to help their parents, do their best to help: collect their toys, put them on a table, place plates and cups on the table, potted flowers, and so on. In kindergartens, such skills are developed in children from the younger group( that is, from 3-4 years).
If, at the request of parents, the house helps someone to respond to a child crying, irritation and laziness, then in no case can not ignore his reluctance. Talk to the kid, explain that everyone in the family must have certain responsibilities, and help - not a shameful business, and vice versa. If such conversations do not produce an adequate result, contact the child psychologist for advice.
The habit of getting everything that pleases can be the cause of child rudeness. The child becomes a consumer of good and his attitude to others is changing. Politeness and a respectful attitude to someone become the strange notions for such children, which in turn can lead to other negative consequences. No opinion other than owning such children is authoritative. He complies with all the demands of ruthlessness, and to force him to do something, he has to persuade for a long time.
Manipulation is inherent in capricious children. It is they who, in order to get something, begin to manipulate the lie and manipulate the relatives first, and then the strangers. In the course of the tears, hysterics and other accessible means.
Parental shame on the behavior of the child
Have you ever blushed for what your baby did? Remember when and how many times this happened. The child screams for the whole yard to attract attention, arranges hysterics in public places, falls to the ground, stomp his legs. If you can not remember this or such cases are extremely rare, there is nothing to worry about, you are on the right path in the upbringing of children. If you easily remember such moments, or, remembering such cases, you are not on your own, then this sign of child promiscuity is inherent in your child.
The child is not responsible for his actions
Let's imagine the situation: in the sandbox children are playing, one hit another squirrel on the head without any for the same reason. The abuser's mum does not react to this event, believing that punishment kills the child's confidence. Another situation: at a lesson, one pupil constantly distracting another, pulling it in, interfering with it. As a result, both "schoolchildren" receive "unsatisfactory" behavior and "parents to school".But the one who was the culprit, the parents do not punish, "because you can not punish children."Bear's service, just about everything.
Pestun is rarely punished because it is useless to punish. Such a child is unlikely to be scolded because he offended someone in the yard, parents will try to simply "not notice" so as not to sow the grain of uncertainty in it. But the effect turns out to be reversed. A child experiences impunity for misconduct, and his behavior can have very bad consequences. Parents will understand their mistakes, but it may be too late when re-educating a child will be late.
Causes of Child Abortion
Parents who learned in this article about their children can be very surprised. It seems to have tried, raised, educated, loved. What's the problem, why did the child become so?
The causes of child promiscuity lie in the following.
How to grow a spoiled child
We have talked a lot about what kind of spoiled child it is. But what it's bad to be, we do not know yet. It would seem that the bad thing is that the child is a little( or a lot of) cursing. However, if you try to look into the future, then the portrait of a modern adult becomes quite unpleasant.
The life of corrupted children in the future is not easy: because of the complex nature, they rarely acquire friends, get poorly in collectives and doomed to loneliness. To call such people successful is also difficult, because of laziness, reluctance to work, they are not able to provide for themselves and their families. So making a family will also be quite difficult.
On the one hand, such a person deserves pity, on the other - hostility, because even as a monk, he is convinced that the most intelligent, beautiful, and wonderful - he is. This is a selfish daffodil with a heavy character.
Teachers and Psychologists' Tips for Reforming
Yes, we do not want to educate such children. Every mother wants her child to be healthy, happy, successful, if he had not much, at least three faithful friends and necessarily a family. And if it already happened that among all of the above signs of promiscuity you learned something that is in your baby, hurry to do re-education, although honestly, it will not be easy to do this.
Explain to the child that other people live on the ground besides him. All of them have their dreams and desires, they have their own thoughts, which, if not listened to, should at least be respected.
Here are some key tips for psychologists and educators who should be guided by re-education of the child.
Instead of the conclusion of
Your child's constant whims are not a reason to lose your hands. If you pay attention to the problem in time and make every effort to solve it, then you can still change for the better. The main thing is to have the patience and gradually move towards the goal. An incentive to fight spanking should be your joint desire with the child to succeed in the future.