How to raise your child's self-confidence

Every father dreams of seeing his child happy and confident in himself, able to defend his place in life, despite all sorts of difficulties. The world does not care about every concrete person, it only provides the opportunity for development. Therefore, it is very common to face the cruelty of

or injustice towards us. The only thing that can be done is to overcome these difficulties. And the bookmark of this quality is important in the period of childhood. What qualities distinguish a confident child and how to raise your confidence in yourself, read in the materials of this article.


1. What is it - A sure child
2. The main thing is not to be confused with the audacity of confidence
3. Typical mistakes in upbringing and what they lead
4. How to cope with the fears of
5. How to develop the leadership qualities of
6. Tips psychologists
7. Instead of finding

What kind of he is a child of

? Parents often worry about and without him, however, the real reason for concern is precisely the uncertainty of a child. After all, if the child finds difficulty contacting peers, avoids new acquaintances, solving various life problems - it is worth starting to do something. After all, the way a child behaves in childhood, will be transferred to adulthood, and parents should develop a sense of confidence in their child.

How to raise your child

To understand whether your child is sure of yourself - one needs to analyze his behavior to match these points. Confidence of the child is manifested by the following factors:

  • is a joy in new acquaintances, the ability to save old contacts;The
  • 's ability not only to accept compliments, but also to do it yourself, without feeling shame or inconvenience;
  • lack of excitement about how others will appreciate you;
  • awareness of their rights, their ability to defend themselves against peers and even adults;
  • persistent goal achievement;
  • 's ability to refuse anyone's suggestions or requests if doing so does not want or hurts plans at all;
  • 's ability to play with pride, without defeat as a tragedy, to believe in yourself and not to feel hatred of whoever wins.

The main thing is not to be confused with the audacity of confidence

Often, parents are confused with the confidence and infamy of the child. These concepts are only partially similar. General for them is the achievement of the goals. However, the difference lies precisely in the methods of implementation.

Just sure in itself child will seek everything honestly .That is, if he sees that it is impossible now to do something or does not make sense - the child may temporarily step back from his plan. Of course, his confidence can be somewhat diminished, but insignificant.

The awkward same child retreats to from the intended purpose of the will not be .And to achieve the desired, she will cry, beat the dishes, lure, substitute other kids, manipulate all the ways available to him. Desiring the truth in the eyes of the people he needs, he will pursue his goal.

This is a completely immoral way of behavior that leads to numerous conflicts. After all, few people will enjoy such an impact on themselves. In addition, there will always be one who will repulse, and it already has serious problems in relations not only with people, but with oneself.

Typical Mistakes in Upbringing and What They Lead to

Confidence is not innate in quality, it is instilled by parents. As a rule, during imitation and communication with them. Among the factors that contribute to the emergence of insecurity in children are listed as follows:

  • Increased anxiety , which is accompanied by excessive care and control. Excessive parenting "cradle" of children contributes to the development of their own uncertainty. Long-awaited children are often taken care of not only in childhood, but also in adult life, constantly supporting the state of incompetence of an adult child. After all, such people will find it difficult to build their own family and take responsibility for it, solve emerging problems and achieve their goals.

    It is explained by the fact that parents, upon the slightest occurrence of any problem or difficulty, rush to the child's proceeds, often not limited to this, but also completely solving the problem for their child. The help should be to help the child understand how to solve one or another problem on their own.

  • Constantly comparing with other children .Comparing a child with other children or relatives, neighbors and even oneself in childhood is the rough and common mistake of parents. At the same time there is a child's oppression of the person, it just hides deep inside, considering that nobody is interesting and has no right to respect from others, the right to exist.

    Thus, a child, grown up on criticism and criticism, grows self-dependent and unincitetive. He gets used to expressing not his own opinion, but what he wants to get from him.

  • Using negative statements .When educating a holistic person, parents should use only positive affirmations. The phrases that "you do not have the talent to become a singer, choose something else", "you have not earned", "you can not", you can not use it. It is firmly concealed in the mind of the child of his underestimated sense of his own importance. And in the future, under the influence of imposed boundaries, he can choose not the life he wanted. Such people are suffering, but they can not be afraid to change anything, because it will destroy all their worldview.
  • Fixing attention to errors. Everyone experiences troubles, nobody is insured against making mistakes and making mistakes. Especially children who only know the world.
    If a child is mistaken, it is not worth screaming or rebuking him, it is better to explain in a calm voice what an error was. Thus, the child will understand how to deal with one or another situation, and his sense of confidence will not shake.
    It is much better to praise for committed actions, producing the right motivation.
  • Manipulative actions by parents .On the way of growing up a child there are situations when for safety or health it is necessary to say a solid "no".However, it's a completely different case when parents speculate on the feelings of the child, causing fear or pity to choose the most suitable option for themselves. Suppose, forcing a child, you can not use "well, eat a spoon behind my mother. Do you not love me? ", It's completely inhumane. After all, the child perceives this so much that, by refusing to give his parents, he shows them his dislike and their relationship can be spoiled, which gives rise to fear. To say that "you will not learn math - you will cleaner" also does not contribute to the development of confidence. To achieve something from a child, you need to explain to him the importance of the event. And it's always worth remembering that the way he chooses can be different from your wishes and that's perfectly normal.
  • How to deal with the fears of

    The problem of fears can not be allowed to gravity. Today, the child may be afraid of darkness, and tomorrow he may develop neurosis, chronic illness or phobias. But these states do not add self-confidence, if not say the opposite. Therefore, the parents' task is to help the child to overcome child fears. How to raise your child

    From an early age, one should not scare the baby "devil", "grandmother" and other fictional characters to achieve some of their goals. For example, if a child does not want to fall asleep or eats poorly, we often resort to such manipulations. It must be said to the child that he is courageous, most courageous and is under mother protection.

    However, it should be understood that fear is a normal state of the human .According to statistics, every second child aged 2 to 5 years begins to feel different fears. With age, a fantasy baby can buy a form in which he will be afraid of absolutely everything. The frontier between reality and the fictional world is very subtle , and the fantasy of children is limitless, and its consequences can be serious diseases of the psyche.

    Social fears in children occur at the age of 3 to 7 years. At the same time, fears caused by fright or intimidation are formed. Natural fear takes place, as a rule, within a month. If the child has not been able to overcome fear in his time, then you should contact the psychologist for advice in order not to aggravate the situation.

    Not is worth to find out relationship with households in the eyes of a child .Children are very painfully experiencing family conflicts and rustle themselves, remaining alone with their fears. It will not affect the formation of confidence. The same can be said about bullying children. In a similar behavior, we ourselves produce a child's fear and impede the formation of his confidence in himself. Do not let children watch terrible transmissions, horror movies, and more. Children under the age of 10-12 do not perceive TV as a TV set. For them, this is the real reality itself.

    Overcoming the fears of children is reduced to the following rules of behavior:

  • do not ridicule the child's fears, no matter how senseless from your point of view, they did not give up;
  • do not criticize and punish the child for fearing something;
  • establish a trusting relationship with the child, try to work together to solve his problems( if he is afraid of darkness, leave a night light in his room, a table lamp included, etc.);
  • do not compare the child with yourself or other children, remember that each person is individual;
  • overcome the childhood fears by the "hardening" method, do not do what your child fears( for example, if the child is afraid to act on the stage before the general public, do not push it there, better teach first to speak in front of a small number of viewers);
  • explain all the moments that are interesting to the child in the language available to him, without resorting to too much adult terms. Often fears arise because of a misunderstanding of a situation.
  • How to raise your child

    How to develop leadership qualities

    First of all, for the development of self-confidence, the child needs to overcome fear. This may be a fear of new acquaintances or the answer at the board, the first expression of their own desire. Ideal solutions will be games that will help develop the understanding of the world and others, yourself, to cope with difficulties, to develop a good self-esteem.

    The game form will allow you to feel as comfortable as possible, yet creating useful qualities. It's better to play games every day at the same time. This will allow the child to feel secure, to be sure what is happening, since all events are quite predictable.

    In order to strengthen leadership skills in a child, you can give it to a sports section, a circle of theatricals or artists. The skills gained in such activities contribute to the emergence of their own significance, because the child already knows something and it makes him proud.

    However, family relationships are equally important. It is necessary to listen to the child's opinion, discussing the decision taken by him, as well as never publicly discuss its failures .The child, who is treated equally, will feel its importance, and will constantly strive for this feeling.

    An important aspect is praise, which should not be excessive. Because its disadvantage or excess can equally harm a child who is confronted with the opinions of strangers and their assessment system. It is important to try to be objective .And if you have noticed obvious problems with your child's feelings, despite all your support, you should contact the psychologist without losing this important moment.

    Associations of psychologists

    According to experts, it is very important to adhere to the following rules for the education of children:

    • You can express dissatisfaction with the actions taken, not the personality of the child. He must always be sure that we love him.
    • You can not endure your child's fears. If your miracle wants to do rock climbing, but you're scared and let go of the bitter, as you are afraid of heights - it's better to put it into the hands of professionals who will teach you the necessary and safe.
    • It is important to give the child the responsibilities that he will perform in person, making him aware of the sense of responsibility. By solving certain difficulties, he will find new and new ways of solving various situations, structuring his time in order to get things done and understand what needs to be done to get the result.

    Instead of Conclusion

    How to raise your child Beginning with the first independent shampoos and ending with school, the child learns to deal with various problems. Depending on how strong the relationship is in the family, how developed the trust relationship between parents and the child depends on the formation of his confidence in himself.