Aggressive child: recommendations to parents
- 16 Aug 01:45
Parents began to alarm their child's behavior: anger, aggression, constant aggression by adults, whose children are in contact with their son or daughter, and the situation every day becomes more complicated. Parents ask: the unclear reason for the formation of such a character, wheretook indignation and aggression, what should be done in these cases?
1. Manifestation of child aggression: the main causes of
2. Kinds of aggression in children
3. Detection of aggression in the child at an early stage
4. Aggressive child: helping to overcome the anger of
5. Parental mistakes: psychological counseling
6. Instead of the conclusion
The manifestation of child aggression: the main causes of
The problem of child aggression, unfortunately, has all the trends of development and today this problem is not an individual family, but the whole society. The inevitable outbreaks of rage, the desire to break, break, pinch and even bite compel adults to isolate the child from other children in order to prevent a predictable conflict. This is a precautionary measure, but not a solution to the problem - on the contrary: the child can be more locked in himself, and the manifestations of aggression will not go away, besides, the situation can get out of control completely.
The first thing to do is to find out the reason, this will help not only control the situation, but also change the entire problem in the root. Children's psychologists are alarming: parents are late trying to solve the problem when the child aggression firmly rooted, and not where else could be solved with parental affection, special games, occupations.
Specialists highlight the main causes of childhood aggression:
- Features of innate temperament and nervous system.
- Incomplete or incorrect education.
- Insecurity is caused by constant fear or stress.
- Manifestation of aggression in an environment of the environment( family, children's collective).
- Achieve leadership in the group by humiliating the dignity of others.
Experts note the manifestation of aggressiveness in the behavior of the child, if he has any physical or psychological kind of defect. Feeling of inferiority to other children, ridicule on their part initially cause aggression at the level of a protective reaction, but over time changes in the psychology of the child can go into another form - revenge.
We should not forget about the categories of children, which are mostly provided in games for themselves. Getting into the team, they often try on themselves the new images, often borrowed from the TV or on the street, and this is not always positive prototypes.
Kinds of aggression in children
Psychologists advise parents whose children show excessive irritability and aggressiveness to learn to warn their bouts of these bursts. Knowing which of these types is this manifestation, it is easier to analyze and take control of the situation. Experts have identified five main types of aggression in children from an early age:
- Physical aggression .Direct( when an attack is conducted on another child in order to humiliate, hurt);indirect( use of the destruction of any material or spiritual values);symbolic( obscene gestures, facial expressions, verbal threats).
- Verbal aggression. The reaction as a manifestation of negative emotions: loud voice, threats. The reason may be pain, humiliation, fear transmitted.
- The targeted form of aggression is .Expressed in the form of an evil attitude towards other children and adults, the spread of gossip, mocking ridicule, evil jokes. This motive of aggression can be formed much earlier than the manifestation, the so-called skeleton of peculiar revenge.
- The unmodified form of aggression is .Children often remain dissatisfied with the lack of something previously promised to them, or by any one of the annoying factors that this is possibly wrong in their view of adult behavior.
Psychologists note the development of another type of child aggression - autoaggression. This species is distinguished by the fact that the child reveals dissatisfaction with not a stranger, but his own behavior. Often this kind has development in adolescence, where the form of self-destruction can go through all sorts of frames.
Detection of aggression in a child at an early stage of
Since their childhood, parents, watching their child smile, frowns the broom, concentrates on something to consider, with relief from relief calm down: their baby, learning the world, develops. This is a very correct definition: the child responds, albeit peculiarly, but it is good that parents tell it, even better if they fix it in their memory: what emotions their baby feels and when. The mistake, and quite widespread in another: parents focus on the key points, not paying attention to trifles, but they are the basis of the child's psychology.
Disregard for parents and incomplete understanding of the development of a child can lead to consolidation in the psyche of the first manifestations of discontent. The child at the very beginning of his life is difficult to deceive adults: he is still learning to live and for a specialist to identify and classify the development of aggression at an early stage will not make up work. There are special tests, games, exercises that help determine the presence and phase of development of irritability in a child. It is important to determine which of the factors makes the child nervous, worried, afraid. It is necessary to observe how the child performs the average complexity of the exercises on patience, erudition and other factors.
When analyzing the behavior of a child, a specialist, even at the earliest stage, will be able to detect non-standard behaviors and deviations in the psyche.
An aggressive child: helping to overcome the anger
Parents who have decided to seriously tackle the problem of controlling the early manifestation of aggression in the psyche of the child need to always remember - looking at the behavior of the child, they see, as in the mirror reflection of their lifestyle. What will have to be eliminated with the child "flight analysis": do not use in conversation sarcasm, screams, eliminate family scandals very significantly, but not all.
TVs often show all sorts of horror stories in movies and cartoons, you need to remove them as soon as possible. Even benign aggression: how to protect oneself, friends, is the call to destroy or hit. The child should feel right: the attention given to him should not be manifest to the case. The kid should not feel burdened when mom or dad are busy with something, even talking to him, parents are involved in education.
Making comments, you need to monitor in which form of communication the child is trying to explain his mistakes: unforgivable aggression and humiliation. If the child does not understand something or he does not get out, you need to help him in this and, possibly, even several times. If the child correctly to explain on the example of other children that to fight, bite, swore is bad, and do it repeatedly, in the outlook of the child to fix aggressive behavior as something wrong. Personal example of parents: please, warmth of relationships, friendly treatment with other parents will complete the training.
At the same time, aggression ceased as a child, and from other children's children, should be permanent.
It is necessary to master several game complexes that help to curb rage: child psychotherapists offer a whole system of such classes. Parents should abandon corporal punishment. It is necessary to exclude conversations about the aggressive behavior of the child in his presence.
Parental mistakes: the advice of a psychologist
Parents can be best parents only: special courses, literature, video tutorials, you can and you need to use everything to avoid mistakes in communicating with the child.
The main mistake of parents that cause anger and irritation of the child is, of course, the aggression of adults themselves, aimed at the baby. Wrong remarks, screams, corporal punishments in no way have a positive result. From the child it is impossible at an early age to demand to perform all unquestioningly and in the order that is pleasant to parents, this suppresses the initiative. Worst of all, if for disobedience the child is wrongly punished: forbid to play, do not talk with him.
The child will be responsible, but it can cause rebellion in his psyche and develop aggression. Trust parents, love and calm microclimate in the family, here are the main factors that serve as the basis for the development of normal psyche in children.
Classes with parents whose children are aggressive behavior
Parents who know that their child is difficult due to an aggressive nature, but the problem is not allowed on their own, need not point to this disadvantage, but help eliminate it. The main task of teaching: point out the disadvantages of upbringing, if any, to help eliminate them. Perhaps it will be necessary to undergo training from specialists who, by the method of lessons in special classes, indicate disadvantages in the behavior of parents, help to get rid of mistakes.
What Advocates Psychologists
A child is a continuation of us and it is very important that he walked his way without repeating parents' mistakes. Parents should not look for easy ways to raise their children: patience, perseverance, correct actions, in the final result, a hundredfold reward.
- Should be excluded from the aggressiveness of behavior, the punishment should be in such a form that the child did not feel pain, and the desire to correct.
- You do not need to strive to humiliate a child.
- Accustom it to constraining aggression, controlling it, demonstrating it on its own.
- Give the child the opportunity to "lower the pairs", after a conflict situation in the game or in some other way.
Instead of Conclusion
If a family is faced with child aggression, you should be patient and try to change something, not only in the child itself, but in himself. Changing your attitude to the baby, you can change his reaction.